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Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Dreaming For Success. Realizing Failures.

Sigh. 13 years on and still no success. I guess I'll keep trying on autopilot.  As much as I like to thing my stories are doing well, they aren't.  Lots of passing interest, but no readers.

It's really hampering on my motivation to write. I've been procrastinating because I haven't been receiving an incentive to write more. 

I practically sabotaged my chances to gain readership by killing off To Like A Man.  I didn't realise how much support that story had received.  Also turning down the Webnovel contract. I wonder if I should've accepted since it's almost impossible for me to gain readers on my own.  Then again, I was concerned they would have me change the story from being gay to straight since it would've been easy enough to do.

This is my probably of writing originals that's too niche and left field for readers.  Basically, I'm writing stories no one wants to read.

It's heartbreaking.

Sometimes I wonder why I write. What is compelling me to write the stories I do?  I don't know if I should continue on.

An Author's life is a cold life when there is no support or motivation to propel you forward.  You have to do everything on your own and always face failure in various shapes and forms.

I've faced more failures and rejections than I have received any success to the point that I don't know what success looks like anymore.

It would be nice where I don't have to fight for things or have to drop and try new strategies to get things working.

If this is me destined for a Prince's cultivation journey, I want off.